Show Your Love Based On Love Languages

There is no "correct" way to show someone you care about them; everyone shows and receives love in different ways. But if you and your partner don't agree on what you both require to feel loved, natural frustrations are likely to result in misunderstandings and misaligned expectations. Introducing the five love languages.

I first read about the love languages in the book by Dr. Gary Chapman "The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate"

In the book he defines the 5 languages as:

Words of affirmation

Quality time

Gifts

Acts of Service

Physical touch

In essence, you tend to prefer to be shown affection in ways that are similar to how you prefer to be shown affection. Most people typically gravitate toward one or two love languages. Try not to narrowly concentrate on one facet of good relationships at the expense of the others because all five are crucial components. A excellent technique to deal with conflict and resentment in your relationships is to become aware of your own and your partner's love languages.

For instance, if you need your partner to express their love for you verbally (words of affirmation), but they choose to demonstrate it by running errands for you instead (acts of service), you won't experience the kind of value you need. Even though your partner expresses their love for you frequently in the way that comes naturally to them, if they aren't using the language of love that you understand, you're likely to mistake what they're trying to say, which will make you both feel frustrated.

To have a successful relationship, you and your spouse don't necessarily need to speak the same love languages. Instead, you should each become proficient in recognizing, comprehending, and speaking in the other's love language.

This entails accepting the possibility that your partner's priorities may differ from your own, but how could it not be the case? Your partner was raised by a different family, possibly in a different culture, and as a result, they developed their own unique demands and ways of expressing themselves. Love languages can be used in friendships as well as romantic partnerships. Every relationship dynamic hinges on being able to express your wants to one another, and love languages are an excellent method to make that process easier.

Take The Test

If you and your partner don't know your love languages, it is pretty easy to figure out. I strongly suggest you both take the test designed by Dr. Chapman and his team. You can find them here.

The difference knowing my husbands love language has been huge. I now understand some of the things he does (gifts) and know that he needs to be touched (physical touch). The book has also helped me to understand my own needs. This is one I highly recommend you read!